lessons from a dwindling cabinet

So yesterday marks one month of being unemployed. During that time period I have had no unemployment or food stamps coming in. We went grocery shopping once. Today my card for food stamps came in, and naturally my first reaction was to run to Wal-mart. DF (dear fiance) immediately texted not to buy any food. And thus begins our constant battle again. I am always naturally inclined to stock up on food. My mother always had a panty full of food when I was growing up, then as an adult my ex-husband and I were always below the poverty line, so having even a weeks worth of food was a luxury. Now that I had the money and knowledge of prepping, of course I'm always thinking about what foods are on sale, what do I need to stock up on, what am I going to be making, etc. But DF absolutely goes crazy if we have more than a weeks worth of food. I truly have no idea why. I'm not letting food go to waste, nor am I buying so much I am storing them outside of the kitchen. But he is insisting that I can't buy more food until the cabinets are empty. I worry about this. We have had screaming matches about the amount of food in the house. He is insistent that we don't need that much food, that at most we only need two weeks worth. Since my argument of "what I lose my job" has unfortunately happened, we are testing my food stockpile.

On the positive side, this has shown me my mistakes in what I am stocking up. We do not eat soup as much as I thought we did, but we do eat a lot more macaroni and cheese. We eat a lot of mashed potatoes, but not so much couscous or anything with bread crumbs.

However, since I have been trying to reduce the amount of pre-packaged food we eat, there is very little I can do. I'm going to have to start looking up homemade recipes so we can stop eating the boxed macaroni and cheese all the time. But the whole point is to have food on hand in case I can't obtain more food for a period of time. Time to get creative. 

a few bad apples

Why are people so quick to blame others instead of looking in a mirror? I have read so many articles about how all doctor's are nothing but money hungry puppets of Big Pharma, shoving meds down peoples throats just to get them out the door. This may be true, but this is what we as a society have created. We are so quick to take to a doctor to court over the smallest thing that it's no wonder they have to order every test and prescribe every medicine to cover themselves. According to a Harvard study, 40% of medical malpractice lawsuits are groundless. ( http://www.nbcnews.com/id/12723303/ns/health-health_care/t/many-medical-malpractice-cases-groundless/#.UlhEkhDwB9k ) We as a society don't want to take the time and effort of letting our bodies heal naturally, we want a quick fix so we can go back to shoving McDonald's down our throats. Doctor's are meant to be a supplemental tool in the care of our bodies. We need to take more responsibility for our health, take better care of ourselves, researching what our options are, trying to heal naturally and if that doesn't work, using the doctor as a 2nd or 3rd resort instead of running to them every time we get a sniffle or sore throat. I'll be the first to admit I spent most of my adult life so far being that person, going in and pretty much telling the Dr/NP that I had a cold and wanted meds. They would perform a cursory exam and give me what I wanted. Now I have a very weak immune system and am having to pay the price. But I am not blaming the doctor's for doing exactly what I asked them to. Take some responsibility, people.

Important Lesson

Today has been up and down, still no energy so I slept late, and then once I started moving around I developed a massive sinus headache. During my errands yesterday I was able to procure some eucalyptus oil, so after dinner I ran a hot bath and added some epsom salt and some oil. However, since my head was pounding so much my hands were shaky, and instead of a few drops I added more than I wanted to, approximately 20-30 drops, and a few on my fingers. The scent was strong, but I thought "it's just oil, no big dealOH DEAR GOD MY FINGER IS BURNING!" ok, well, obviously I must have a cut or something, nothing to worry about. So I got in the bath, started to relax, breath the steam, notice the tingling in my sinuses and lungs.....and skin......wow it's really tingly........REALLY TINGLY. Is my skin peeling off?! Did I accidentally bath in Bengay? MAKE IT STOP!!!!! so I drained the water and sat in an empty bath tub for 20 minutes. The headache didn't go away, but now my butt is tingly. I think I'll get a dropper next time instead of adding it from the bottle.

So with my last $20, I went to Publix and bought a few lemons, organic french fries, which was good, but then I also got chicken nuggets (buy one get one free), a flat of Dasani water, and regular eggs. For some reason Dasani water is the only kind that tastes good to me, and right now I need as much water as I can.

a very fine line

I am happy to report that my chest has been without issue for the past couple days, but the sinus pressure and pain in my face and ears remain unabated. I had problems sleeping last night because my joints hurt so badly. And my energy levels are still very low; I got incredibly frustrated yesterday because a simple chore of vacuuming my apartment took twice as long because I had to keep stopping to rest. I've been good about taking my multi-vitamin and staying away from soda, so I can't explain the symptoms other than my body is still fighting off the plague.

Since I woke up so early with joint pain, I took another epsom salt bath, and whether it was the salt or hot water it seemed to help so I was able to get a couple more hours of sleep. All my containers were full so I couldn't save the water this time. As I was running my errands I was INCREDIBLY AWESOME and managed to drive past the Taco Bell without stopping on my way to the Fresh Market and instead had a banana and a bottle of kombucha to last me until I got home to a bowl of my homemade soup. I picked up a handheld juicer at Wal-mart so now I am sipping on a glass of water with fresh squeezed lemon juice, not the bottled stuff. Research shows that it does make a difference, so we shall see if it helps. As I was checking the mail I saw that my pool and fitness center for the complex are under renovations, so those avenues of exercise are out.

I was looking around the interwebs trying to find the recipe I used for the homemade laundry soap, first going through my prepper websites and then my green sites. I discovered that I am, sadly, caught between the two worlds of prepping and eco-friendly. You'd think they would be one and the same, but in some ways they really aren't. One of the basic tenets of prepping is to have a large food supply, mostly canned soups and veggies, pastas, etc. But of lot of the stuff they recommend prepping has a lot of preservatives, GMOs, and a high salt content, due to it's nature of being very shelf sustainable. But when you look into the ecofriendly side, a lot of the idealogy seems to be fresh fruit, fresh veggies, raw milk, etc. Which as a prepper you should have a garden, undoubtedly, but there is always the backup in case you have a bad crop or something. So I guess for now I shall walk to line between eco and prep, using my conscience and wallet to guide me.